Kindly fasten your seatbelt.

There is a newly-wed couple sitting right behind me doing what they think is ‘whispering’ about what they want to do to each other on their first night of honeymoon.

There is a group of ladies who detest a certain Saraswati who won’t move her kitty-party date.

A man punching onto his keyboard so hard I feel bad for technology.

An airhostess who has conveniently forgotten to get my water for the fourth time.

A kid who cries every time there is turbulence and then again when there isn’t.

A certain hairy-nosed man who is snoring so loud, the hair is giving his already annoying snores a complimentary whistle.

A middle-aged woman right in front of me who cannot decide whether to keep the window shades up or down.

An alarm that keeps going off every 20 mins somewhere in the aircraft. Low-key praying it’s an alarm, by the way.
(ahem!)

And a man next to me loudly chewing peanuts and staring into my laptop screen as I type this.

Can’t wait to get off this plane only so someone can ask me how my flight was.

It’s surprising how my answer will always be – ‘It was great!’IMG_7577What a fun experience a plane ride is to me every time. I’ve always had this love-hate relationship with airplanes. I wish to be on one all the time, and the moment I step onto it, I am like.. Ugh!

 

You’ll be surprised at how similar men and airplanes can be in so many ways. (hmm.)

The night before every plane journey is a mix of excitement, fear, paranoia, prayers and last-minute packing.

Excitement because travel makes me oh so happy in my heart.

Fear because what if the plane crashes and the last thought I had was – ‘Why is the food cold?’

Paranoia because what if someone steals my belongings from my bag which is locked with a 12 digit safe code and securely tucked in the overhead bin.

Prayers because nobody wants a screaming kid next to them on an airplane. And since nobody wants it, chances are that kid is in seat 17B while I gloat over my window-view from seat 17A.

And last-minute packing because I am one of those people who trust themselves enough to know, no matter how many days in advance I start packing for my trips, I am going to forget to pack something or the other. So why pretend?

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I prefer early morning flights. Mainly to avoid the city traffic. Also, I like the idea of having the entire day to myself.

A lot of how my flying experience goes has to do with the on-ground staff of the airline.

Especially on morning flights, I am one rude check-in exec away from gulping 3 shots of espresso to get through the day.

Also, I am still waiting for the golden day when I can use the little fame I have to get a free upgrade on my seat. Apparently, airline company employees are not that big a fan of YouTube yet. Or maybe just MostlySane.

After yet another failed attempt at trying to get a smile out of the security officer who scans your butt in a curtained area, tackling queue-defying aunties with razor-sharp elbows is the next thing on my agenda. All those years of taking the Mumbai local to college had to pay off some day. All for getting my bag off the security conveyor belt.

Queues are a great place to judge character, by the way.

You know exactly whether certain people are worth a smile when you pass them in the aisle on your way to the washroom.

And then of course there is all the extra time you miscalculated before leaving home. If you are from a middle class Indian family like me, your father is going to insist on leaving an eternity before your reporting time.  Hence when check-in and security is breezy especially when you don’t expect it to be, you end up spending too much time before boarding convincing yourself why you shouldn’t buy any food as meals are included in your ticket. Ahh!

Unlike common opinion, on most days I love airplane food. Call me crazy but yummy or not, the idea of feasting (or nibbling, when it comes to some airlines) thousands of feet above the ground is kind of revolutionary to me.

The food on today’s flight though is better than most others. Keema Pav? Hard to hate on that.

If only all the peanut chewing noises coming out of my co-passenger hadn’t made me nauseous to the idea of chewing all together.

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But the one good thing about being stuffed in a tin box with people who might or might not be fond of each other is just how considerate everyone gets on an airplane.

I have held enough unknown shivering hands every time there was turbulence.

I have seen a doctor perform CPR on a baby choking on food.

I have seen an elderly couple talk to a young man during takeoff only so they could take his mind off his fear of flying alone.

I have seen my parents hold hands in June of 2016 when our plane couldn’t land for an hour and the turbulence convinced us we weren’t going to make it.

I have seen an airhostess hug a man who kept getting sick.

I have seen a bunch of strangers stand in unison against a man who kept touching the airhostess inappropriately.

I have seen newly married couples getting congratulated.

I have seen expectant mothers getting safe-flying advice.

I have seen smiles.

I have seen frowns.

I have seen fights.

I have seen kisses.

I have seen life.

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And as much as everyone complains about bad food and rude stewards and annoying co-passengers, we still make do. And we would do it again. And again.

I wish we were more like us on earth like we are above.

 

336 Comments

  1. Atikur Raheman

    After creating channel on youtube, everyone says the term “I’m an youtuber”😂 . But only those ones are recognised who’s videos are on trending like you. Well, it’s my first Blog ever to read and it’s been possible while i saw your video on youtube and then became crazy to follow you on Instagram and there’s a link provided by you which took me here and made me feel special that i couldn’t stop myself to write a few lines.The lines became lengthy and now it’s even more. I don’t think celebrities have that much of time to read these stuffs. Lastly, as likely I say to everyone that please subscribe my channel “Atikur n Mishra vines 🐶 ” on youtube and press the bell 🔔 icon to get the latest updates. I’m also an youtuber 😂 please give me a recognition 🙏.

  2. Adrita Bardhan

    An ordinary and very simple journey of a plane is written extraordinarily , though I don’t have any plane journey experience until now but I can visualize the atomshpere inside a plane through your writing and the pictures are also very nice .Keep writing more blogs and all the best to you .

  3. Rasika Sonar

    Hey Prajkta, amazing content on your youtube channel and even more amazing is your blog. Awesome pics and awesome is the way you have used them to describe your scenarios. I wish I had read your blogs before. Love you 🙂

  4. Shubham Mittal

    Your video on 6 books to read if you hate reading got me here.
    This was the first article I’ve read on your blog.

    Suffice to say I’m your new stalker! (only in a good way, haha)

    All the very best! 🙂

  5. Kashish

    It’s 3am right now. I only started reading this because I was bored and in no intention of going to sleep. I certainly did not intend to read the whole thing at first, but as soon as I started reading, I couldn’t stop myself on reading more, and more, and more. And believe me or not but this is the first blog I read and felt like reading more, but the blog ended too soon. Waiting for more such blogs, thanks for making my night. LoveLove!

  6. Hiba Shahid

    Found out about your blog through ur YouTube channel..and the, I’ve never been so interested to read anything. Finished all your blogs in flat 20 min and LOVED them … keep writing 😗

  7. Rajeev Vaswani

    You write beautifully perfect. And I guess, writing is your real #lovelove.
    Do follow my page “lovelove_teen” on Instagram and have a good day.

  8. Arif

    I guess your YouTube video and this blog will definitely change my mind by now. I was trying to get back to myself for a long long time. #kickoutcheater #freemind #LoveLove

  9. Gayatri Bhagowati

    Your writing makes people visualise things as they read and that is a very desirable quality for a writer. Good luck for your future endeavours Prajakta!

  10. Vishal Joshi

    This was amazing to read. Your language is so on point and funny. It was like you were talking whatever coming to your mind instantly and I am the listener.

  11. Shahrukh

    Again a nice blog Prajakta !! This is so relateable .
    You always amazeus with your skills, I am your huge huge fan.
    Keep doing crazy things and be funky and bubly as you are 🙂

  12. Rushabh Gadiya

    So relatable and so so amazing😍
    You make me wonder alot of times, like how much workaholic are you?😅
    So many stuffs to do in such crunch time😄
    You manage everything really well❤️

  13. Soumya

    Heyaa! I think it’s the first ever blog I have read and I found this so interesting, warm, beautiful and soulful!
    Even I end up writing my mind out sometimes but not when I intentionally want to. But after seeing the simplicity in this write up, I think I am definitely motivated and I would surely try writing not just when no one is there to listen to me while I am full of thoughts but also when I explore something new.
    So, thankyou. And keep entertaining us please :’)

    A sweet sixteen,
    Soumya

  14. Rahul

    I think this is one of the my favorite blog which I have used to read and attract me again and again towards it..Than you for sharing such type of articles.

  15. Pradnya Patil

    1st time i read your blog….you r amazing writer too….i am already in love with all your videos on youtube…..i made my daughter to read your blogs….great you r…such a multi talented girl you r…..keep writing….keep inspiring…..

  16. Sumana

    I really liked the closing sentence of ur article ‘I wish we wre more like us on earth than above’.
    That’s really 2 give a thought abt.
    I liked the way u hve put up ur flying journey n similarly i jus hope 2 write down or put down my thoughts on paper.
    Evrytym I try 2 I end up not writing anything becoz I dunt find time.thats sad n I hope I make time 4 writing really soon.😀

  17. Unknown

    Unlike a YouTuber.. your sense in English oh… It’s a lot much attractive. Y can’t you make a video on being home alone.. wat r all the things which v do.. when v r home alone.

  18. Pooja Bhavsar

    Love this new addition can’t believe I’ve been missing out! Huge fan of your videos! Any tips for new bloggers? Any suggestions for platforms to use such as WordPress?

  19. Srushti Karmarkar

    Hey wow!!! this is the first time I read your blog and it’s juzz amazing, I had reached in an airplane imagining things as you wrote above seriously,good start with my day out today consuming such an inspirational content.

Tell me what you think, DumDums!